3 Reasons Your Habit Isn't Sticking & How To Change It

Before we start talking about your habits and how to make them stick, we have to talk about some of the reasons why that is so.

Like I do with money, I think it’s really important to call out the misconceptions that we know, hear about and probably believe. Why? Because they influence your actions and that my friend, is impacting your results. 

MISCONCEPTIONS

1. Habits are not about grit and willpower. Yes, we might need to tap into these resources from time to time, but they won’t get you to the finish line. 

2. Habits are hard to break because of neuroscience and your brain, not because you don’t want it enough. In fact, if you have a strong desire but the effort you are willing to put into it isn’t as high, you’re actually setting yourself up for failure. True story friend. 

3. Your brain doesn’t actually know what’s good for you. Any change you are trying to implement will trigger your brain to deliver “deceptive messages.” Why? Because it wants to keep you in your current habits because…that’s what it knows.  What your brain doesn’t know is what is good for you and what isn’t. So, we have to be smarter than our brain and choose what we listen to. 

THE BIGGEST CHALLENGE

The biggest challenge you are likely to face when you are creating new habits is what I mentioned in #3 - your deceptive brain messages.  

Have you ever started something new - budget, workout plan, morning routine, etc. and hit a moment that felt tough?  Do you remember what happened? 

I’ll tell ya:  your brain used it as an opportunity to barrage you with deceptive messages to keep you from doing what is out of your current habit.  These sound like: 

• You might as well just eat it, you haven’t stuck to an eating plan 

• You can’t stick to this budget, what were you thinking? 

• You feel really cozy in your bed right now, it’s too cold to get up and move your body

• This goal is too unrealistic, there’s not way you’re going to be able to do this

Do these sound familiar?  I’m raising my hand too, friend, because I am not immune to these messages. 

But let me tell you: KNOWING this is your brain and has nothing to do with YOU, is a game changer. 

MAKING IT EASY

So knowing that when you try something new, your brain is going to swoop in and derail you, it just puts you in a place of empowerment.  So, let’s chat about how we can navigate those messages and implement some tricks to make it easy. 

1. Whatever the new habit/goal - know how important it is to you with 10 being SO IMPORTANT. And, know WHY it is important.  When you have these two combined, it’s meaningful, and that’s what we are going for.

2. Know HOW MUCH EFFORT you are willing to put towards that goal.  If you put - Stick to a budget as a 10, but your effort level is a 3…guess what?  That’s not in alignment. You’re not gonna want to stick to it. Then we get to ask questions as to what is impacting the effort level. For many - you simply feel you can’t achieve it. Your expectations will be wildly beyond what you can step into. So adjust the goal. Instead of STICK TO A BUDGET (for example), but - Track my expenses for a month. More tangible and easier for you to put into action. 

3. It has to be EASY. Remember, our brain will always take the easy route like that kid in gym class who would always cut the corners on their laps. This is why your brain wants to keep you in your current habits, because it is EASY. Simply ask “Does this feel easy?”

4. When those deceptive brain messages pop up, stop them in their tracks with a simple, “No.” Then move into what you DO want to focus on.  SO instead of, “I can’t do this” - you get to stop the message and say, “No. Not true. I can do this. This is easy”. Your brain will focus on where you point it, so don’t give into the negative. 

5. Be mindful of your “I am” statements. That’s like cement for your mindset and habits. “I’m not a good communicator” or “I’m not good with numbers” - just seals the deal to keep you there. If you have a hard time making a statement that doesn’t feel true to you like: “I’m a good communicator” try something in the right direction, “I’m improving my communication”. Tell your brain what you want.