This Is The #1 Killer Of Calm

We can all use some calm in our lives...like every.single.day.  Especially in those moments where we sense that chaos is building power and we feel...frazzled and unfocused, right? Can you relate to that?

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When I find myself in those moments, I have to remember the #1 killer of calm....control.

OR, I should say perceived control.  It’s stressful when we want a guarantee about our choices right? You know why? Because deep down, we know it isn’t possible.

Whatever you’re going through, if calm is what you need right now, try these 5 simple steps to move through to the other side.

STEP #1. Write down everything that is stressing you out and causing chaos.

STEP #2. Once you have your list, cross out the items that you TRULY cannot influence (like waiting for test results, a job offer etc.)

STEP #3. Out of the items remaining, circle the one that feels the heaviest or most stressful.

STEP #4. Be curious and ask yourself, “why is this causing these feelings?” - write down what comes up for you.

STEP #5. After this process, if you are still feeling stress, ask yourself if there any action you can take, that will help. 

In most cases, you will start to feel better by step #2. The simple act of writing down everything that is in your brain and then clearly defining what you can’t influence, is a magical reframe for you and your brain that will help you move forward.

Pro Tip: Do this exercise at the beginning or end of the week on a consistent basis and you'll start creating some amazingly "calm" habits.